So, Easter is coming. What do you all have planned for the day? Me? I have not a clue. I spoke with my father a few days ago and all he knew was they have to go to my sister’s to give BMan and JD their Easter gifts. There’s no church. No family dinner. No nothing. I’m bummed. While I’m not especially fond of religious holidays and the religious connotations involved (imagine that!) I do look forward to a day with my family and eating good food.
FF isn’t big on religious holidays at all. So right now I’m looking at attending church by myself (true, I don’t like organized religion, but I do enjoy tradition and church & Easter kinda go hand in hand) and making a big ham dinner with all the sides (and soup with the leftovers – wahoo!) for just two of us.
I invited my family over for an Easter brunch but no one’s taking the bite. I’ve been living in my condo for almost a year and my sister doesn’t even know where it is. My parents have been over once. Yet, I can’t count how many dinners and parties I’ve been to at her house and my parent’s in that amount of time. Why do I have to travel all the time? Sometimes I want to host! I love being a host – the organizing, the cooking – everything about it is enjoyable for me. Now, I understand that Sis has two little ones and therefore it isn’t easy to travel (they live about a half hour from me) but is coming over for brunch on ONE day really going to kill her? Sis and my parents see each other almost every day. Ma watches JD 5 days a week. Sis and BIL (brother in law) have dinner at my parent’s every Thursday. And then, they get together at least once over the weekend!
Now my parent’s will call me and say, “We miss you. We never see you.” Does it make me a bad daughter because I have my own life and I’ve severed the cord? Don’t get me wrong – I love LOVE my family but I’m almost 30 and proud to be independent (always have been – just ask Ma). But I also feel that because my presence is missed I’m the one that’s gotta drag my ass down the road and rearrange my schedule to make it happen. I don’t mean to sound bitchy and I know I’m tremendously lucky to have the family system that I do. I’m just sad that I feel like I’m doing all the work sometimes.
So, anyone have any suggestions? How do I handle telling my family that I’m upset about this without coming across as a whiny baby? Or am I a whiny baby? Also, how do I start some new traditions with FF? He knows I live for these holidays when I can cook, bake, plan (and eat!) and spend time with those I love and care about, but he’s not into them. I would never force it on him (although he had his first Christmas tree in over ten years last Christmas – and he even admitted to kinda liking it! Shhhh – don’t tell him I told you!) but I very much want to involve him in a way that won’t make him uncomfortable. Wow – this is a terrible post – maybe I should boycott Easter? I’m eagerly awaiting your suggestions XO